I think for me, perhaps the greatest source of worry and anxiety is the future. Not knowing what is going to happen next is a very helpless feeling for me. I guess I like to have some kind of control over things, while at the same time, let things flow organically. The last few months of my SUPER senior year have been kinda difficult. People keep asking me what I will be doing. It's a legitimate question, but I must always answer with "I don't know" because I don't actually know.
Maybe this is a time for God to test my faith. Could he be purposefully shutting doors to other opportunities in order to test me to see if I will rely upon him? Or am I just not following the plan He actually has for me and that is why the doors are shutting? It is really easy to encourage someone by telling them to have faith but to have it yourself is a whole different story. How tough is it to watch as a third party determines what happens in your life?
Luckily for me, the third party that is in charge of my life loves me more than I could ever know. He is the creator of the universe and in control of everything that happens to and around me. I am not gonna lie. It has been difficult to learn how to have more faith in God. I have a feeling God will be rolling more opportunities to trust Him my way in the near future...
I guess the obvious verse for this entry is: Jeremiah 29:11-13
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."
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I am having the same feeling right now too.
ReplyDeleteEven though I still have a few years until my graduation, it just hit me again and again about what am I going to do after that.
Job oppotunities for my major in Malaysia is really low. =(
I am asking Lord about His plan for me. And try hard to listen to Him. And pray that I will have the obedience to follow whatever His plan is for me.
I agree that it's difficult sometime to have faith on your own while it's so easy to encourage others to have faith.
I am leaning on that verse too. Jeremiah 29: 11-13. Seek Him with all our hearts.
Blessings,
Amy