It's Hard Being First

Sometimes it's hard being first.

You have no example to follow.

You have no idea if you're doing things the right way.

It is a lonely feeling.

Their eyes are watching you.

What will the others think?

What will the others say to you?

What if you mess it up?

But what if you succeed?

What if you are doing things the right way?

How will you know if you don't try?

Reflections on the Past 4-5 Years of My Life

Senior Year Part 1 (2008-2009)

This entry has more of a show and tell feel to it. The first part of this story has to do with my room. Here are some pics so you can get an idea of what I was living in. I actually signed up for this room to live by myself. I signed up for it without even looking at it. I didn't know the size until I got there on move in day.

A view from the door... You can see how the huge tv dwarfs everything in my room.

The original room configuration. I could not fully rotate that desk chair 360 degrees. There wasn't enough room.

The new room configuration, where I could fully rotate my desk chair.

Okay, I just put this on here to make me look smarter... hopefully it worked...

A surround sound speaker. A man must have his sound system.

My desk. I like to call it organized confusion. It might look messy, but I usually don't lose anything. I promise.

This was my room. It was quite small, but I eventually learned to live with it. I had a few freshmen come by the first night and comment on how small the room was. One even called it a "jail cell". That's what I get for not shopping around first right? The very first night I was there, some of the previously mentioned freshmen that came into my room smelled the blood right away, figuratively speaking. Within five minutes of talking to me, they discovered that I was over 21 (and thus eligible) and asked me to buy them some alcohol at the store. I never did know how serious they were, but obviously I told them I wouldn't do that. I imagine they were serious.

This floor I lived on was the craziest floor I was ever a part of. I guess it was never boring either, like it or not. I lived with a bunch of freshmen. I was about as old as my RA or perhaps even older, I never did figure that one out. There were fights, loud noises at night, blood drops randomly in the hallway, kids returning from the parties drunk, a snowball fight in the hallway, and real fights among other random stuff. Never have I ever been a part of a crazier group of guys.

In December of this year, we had the 2nd World Missions Summit, so obviously I was there. It was a Chi Alpha Nationwide Conference that they put together bringing in missionaries from around the world, as well as students from all around the country. This was a pretty crazy conference. I got to hear from people who are on the front lines of ministry on other college campuses or in other countries. I got to see some of my friends that I had met the year before at SALT again, so that was fun. I also met some new people like the campus pastor at University of Wyoming (totally random...). Our Chi Alpha group had recently sent them some money for their Chi Alpha house, I believe, so maybe it wasn't so random... It was here at this conference that I signed the Give a Year, Pray About a Lifetime card along with a few hundred of my closest friends. I didn't give too much thought about it then, but this decision would turn out to affect my life in a great way.

Since the conference was in Cincinnati, I walked to Kentucky with a group of my friends in the middle of the night which was just as much fun as the year before at SALT. And since it wasn't as cold this time, we didn't freeze.

This was the year I was supposed to apply to my clinical classes for Medical Technology. I didn't feel that great about my chances because my grades weren't spectacular, and one of the other larger portions is the interview and I definitely didn't have confidence in that either. I decided I would try anyway and you never really know what's going to happen (only God knows). I pretty much knew I wasn't going to get in, but yet it still made me very upset to read the rejection letter because no one likes rejection. It was hard to take because this is what I was planning my life for. I changed my major with the expectation that I would be moving on from college life to these clinical classes. God had other plans for me (which will be addressed in the next entry of this series).

The next big event of the year was the spring break trip to Carbondale, IL to hang out with a more veteran/larger Chi Alpha group. Even though they have a smaller campus than Purdue, they had a much larger group than we did at the time. We basically did everything that their Chi Alpha group normally does along with them. We also did some special outreaching stuff like surveys and God table. We also watched this seminar from Bill Gothard. There was so much truth and teaching presented in those videos that I was exploding by the second day. I struggled with the sheer volume of truth he presents. One day we had a planned fun day. We went to this park to hang out. We were supposed to play ultimate frisbee, but the frisbee was left at the house we were staying at. So we decided to play ultimate water bottle. Same rules as ultimate frisbee, except that the frisbee is replaced with a full water bottle as seen below...

While we were playing, I got hit in the face with the water bottle, which promptly ended the game. I was hit in my mouth and was slightly dazed for a few minutes afterward...Oh what fun!

During the week before Easter, we did some special outreaches for the first time on campus. We had some extra surveys and we also read the Bible out loud to people walking by. I occupied the very first time slot with my friend Levi at 11 am Monday morning. I was freezing cold and I forgot my gloves. I had a hard time feeling my hands after that was over, but hopefully someone somewhere gained something from hearing God's word.

This was a pretty crazy year as they all seem to be. But I saved the craziest for last...

Reflections on the Past 4-5 Years of My Life

Junior Year (2007-2008)

I didn't know it at the time, but looking back on it, this was the year that completely turned my life around in every way. In every area of my life, I was turned upside down by Jesus. Let's go for a ride...

So this is the year that Chi Alpha got started on Purdue's West Lafayette campus again after a significant absence. God answered my desperate prayers (I am sure I wasn't the only one praying...) in pretty short order. This is a pretty significant request, and so it seemed like God was just waiting for us to ask in order to unleash the blessings. At least thats what it felt like. We started out with a decent number for a new Chi Alpha group, probably 15-20 people or so. Many of them were from the church I had started going to, or from the Bible study from the previous year. We had our meetings on Thursday nights.

Our Pastor preached on a wide variety of topics that fall. From what I've heard, she would pray and ask God, hear from God, and then prepare a message. Which is a good way to do things I might add. Of course the topic I am going to talk about is the Baptism of the Holy Spirit (BHS), which you can read about for yourselves in the Bible. I guess you could say that it changed my life. I had received the BHS before when I was younger, but I didn't know what to do with it. I didn't really know that much about it. But after hearing the sermon, I went to the front and received it. I am not someone that does too many crazy things, but this would be right up there...

This is a really good point to mark the before and after picture. Everything before this is the before picture, and everything after this is the after picture. For my life, it really is like those commercials on TV that you never believe the transformation that occurs from before to after. I would argue that it my transformation is even more unbelievable. Those that knew me before and then after know what I'm talking about...

I don't even know what happened to me. I can't explain it, other than I gave God permission to come in and clean me up and do His work to me and He did that. It was all a blur to me. I still can't ever remember much about it. One thing I can say he did was open me up to people. He gave me an ability to quickly be open with people. I was suddenly able to look people in the eyes when conversing with them. Maybe this is easy for some people, but this was a true transformation for me. He literally unleashed a different person...

Maybe some other good thing also happened that year, but the most important thing left to talk about is the Spring Break Trip we took to Peoria, IL and IHOP-KC for the week. I believe this is the other thing that really helped to shape me as a person during my college life. The idea behind this trip was to expose us to what a "typical" Chi Alpha meeting and group looked like. All our missionaries had participated in Chi Alpha during their time in college and had an idea in our head, but they decided it would be more powerful if they could show us instead of telling us.

I almost didn't go on this trip. What an opportunity I would have missed. It was a day or so before the deadline and I hadn't even remotely thought about going, but my friend Lauren bugged and nagged me into going and so I decided to give it a try. (Sidebar: There could be people around you waiting for you to invite them to come along. They probably want to go, but people want to be wanted, and this helped me to go.) I got signed up just in time for this. Man, am I glad she did so...

First stop on the trip is Peoria, IL and the Chi Alpha there. I was fortunate enough to stay with a gracious host family. The first night we got there we had about an hour to go to our places we were staying, and then we had to go to their service at their sweetness Chi Alpha house. I decided to have a little fun on this trip, to let loose and try to get rid of the inhibitions that have entangled me so much in my life, within reason of course. I set a goal for the night (see my post about setting goals...). It was to meet 5 new ladies and remember their names. Difficult, but attainable and measurable. I don't know that I had it that night, but by the time I left, I knew more than 5 ladies names... I was determined hahahahahahaha!!!

While we were there, one of the things we did was some evangelism on their campus. This came in the form of God Table, and prayer walking, and singing songs out loud in public. All of these things were very new to me. God was by no means new to me, but sharing God in public and standing up for my faith was a new thing for me. It was quite scary but I would never see most of these people again I figured, so I decided to try everything out that I could. It felt really good to finally step out there and try something bold for Jesus.

This next part is a little awkward to tell, but I believe it's necessary to tell, since I'm trying to be honest and forthcoming with everyone that reads this. This one is about words. The words we say to others especially. I certainly had some problems with the words and sarcasm I was using toward other people. I liked to use it cause I thought it was funny, and I usually got a good laugh when using it as well. However it was just plain mean sometimes and degrades people where that needs not to happen. I slipped on it this one time and called one of my friends "trash" when under normal circumstances I would normally never do this. Needless to say, that was the last time I ever did that. I felt so gross all over after that happened. Even today if I say something negative about someone else, it makes me feel totally gross all over. Today I guess I would say when other people do it and I am not even involved, it still makes me feel gross...

The second part of this revolutionary trip was the trip to the International House of Prayer in Kansas City. I believe it's in the Missouri part of Kansas City... A building solely dedicated to prayer. How unbelievable that is... It was a strange experience being there, even for me. Being raised in a Pentecostal environment, I have seen a lot of things, but I even saw some things here that were strange for me. I guess there are various ways we can worship God, and who am I to say what is good and bad. There were flag wavers, and dancers among others. I also had an opportunity to go to their prophecy room to have a word of prophecy spoken over me. That was an interesting experience. Maybe one of these days I will go back and listen to that tape. I can't even begin to describe the experience I had there, other than the fact that God was all over that place. It is something you really have to go and experience for yourself.

This trip was one of the highlights of my time at Purdue. I would say that after this trip, I actually felt like part of a family. I felt like a part of something that was bigger than myself. I had finally found what I was looking for. Some people to love and accept me for who I am. I really felt close to the group that went with us on the trip. We all grew closer together, and closer to God. It was one of the best times of my life. And I am sure glad that my friend bugged me about it until I decided to go... Thanks Lauren...

Reflections on the Past 4-5 Years of My Life Part 2

I can tell you right now that the next two entries will be especially long...If that means much to any of you.

Sophomore Year (2006-2007)

This year, as I remember it, was the year that my life kinda started to change for the better. It started to head in the right direction...

I started off with a new roommate. My first one wasn't bad or anything, but I felt that I would be more comfortable with my new one. He is from my home church, and I had known him a while, so I was sure that we would get along well, and we did.

This next part of the story would change the course of my life forever. My roommate got this religious preference card from the university (which I never filled out...). He filled it out and turned it back in. So later on he gets this email from some random person about a call-out meeting for Chi Alpha. We had only heard of this because his dad was a part of it when he was in college. So we both attended the meeting. I of course was freaking out because there was a lot of new people, and I wasn't doing so well with new people yet. I had a good time because I absolutely love bowling. There was also an opportunity to sign up to show interest in a bible study and a morning prayer meeting. And being raised in a Christian home, these introductory activities were non-threatening to me so I showed some interest by signing up.

By this time, I had made a few more friends on our floor. I had probably doubled my friend output from my freshman within the first month. There were some people on my floor that were very friendly to me. Being a bunch of guys, we of course had Halo to draw us together and build community. I guess all you need to make friends is some common courtesy and some common interest...

While I was making some kind of progress in the friends department, the academic department was suffering a major depression. I was doing worse and worse in my CS classes. The general disappointment in my poor performance lowered my self-esteem because I placed great value in how I did in school, and not much else really. I felt like a failure every time something didn't go right for me. I was way too hard on my self and it took a toll on me. I tried to get some help with my school work, but the professors I saw didn't seem to want to help me. Or maybe they just couldn't? I don't know. The combination of loneliness and depression from lack of self-esteem and self-worth is a dangerous one. While I never came close to attempting to take my own life, I definitely thought about it. I used to always wonder if anyone would notice if I was gone for good. The truth is, someone would have noticed. Someone would have cared. God cares...

So I was having all of these problems. This made me a desperate person. With God, wonderful things tend to happen when desperation is introduced. I attended all the bible studies and prayers I could go to with the Chi Alpha group, mostly out of wanting new friends. While I was there I decided I would take advantage of the situation and cry out to God in prayer. I don't know if I would call it prayer necessarily, more like I was begging God for some kind of answer for how to fix my life which at any moment could have slipped down hill for the worst.

Fast forward to around Valentines day in 2007. We had a huge snow storm that week that yielded over 10 inches of snow and got classes cancelled for two days for the first time in 20 years. This was a rare occurrence indeed. I don't think I left Earhart for two straight days. There was no reason to since there was food right inside of my building...

This snowstorm was also significant for another reason. A reason that would impact my life immensely and a reason that continues to impact my life today...

I forget when exactly I found this out, but some new Chi Alpha missionaries were coming to visit us. They happened to be visiting the day of the snow storm. I am glad they didn't let a few inches of snow get in their way...

Their visit, and announcement of their pending arrival in the fall was such an answer to prayer. All through out the times of prayer and bible study, I really felt like we had something good, and that if we just had some permanent full-time staff that things would really take off. This wasn't really a vision in the classical sense, but a visionary mindset... I could just feel it...

They had a gift for me, since they are generous people. A book entitled Secrets of the Secret Place by Bob Sorge. They didn't know it at the time, but I was not much of a reader at the time. I am only today reading that book, and am about half way through. And I of course recommend it to anyone looking to transform their own personal time with God.

Back to my troubles in school. My solution to the problem, and after much consideration, was to change my major to Medical Technology. I did this realizing that it would require me to be in school for an extra year, but I figured and extra year here would be better than being unhappy and probably failing out of school...

As you can tell, this was the year that started things in the right direction for me. However, the ball really got rolling in my junior year of college...

Reflections on the Best 4-5 Years of My Life

I have decided to start a new series. The title is above... It will be a five part series, with each part talking about one year of my college life. I love to tell stories with vivid details, especially if people like to read them, and as you can tell I love to write. I will try to relive everything I can where appropriate, the good and the bad. I hope you enjoy the ride...

Freshman Year (2005-2006)
You always remember the first time you do something if it's a big life experience. This was the first time I was away from home for an extended period of time. I had some friends around (my roommate was a friend of mine), but I was largely on my own... I felt so alive, so free. I had usually been as independent as one can be living as a minor under his parents roof, but this was a new start for me. They say that you can be anyone you want to be when you come to college.

I can remember vividly the first morning I went to class, so I will describe it for you all. It was a Monday morning. The sun was shining and it was a comfortable August morning in 2005 (Wow that's a long time ago). My roommate and I discovered that we both had class at the same time at around the same place, so being two wide-eyed freshmen, we decided the night before to walk over together. My roommate and I had come from a somewhat large high school, but Purdue seemed very large even for us. Our classes were at 8:30 am. So we made the long walk from Shreve Hall. My class was Calculus I and it was in the Electrical Engineering Building. I remember being amazed at how many people there were just walking around, and then I got to the room where my class was being held. I was in shock at how large the room was. I am not sure how many people that room holds, but it was larger than anything I had ever seen... And of course since the class was calculus, I had no idea what was going on and neither did anyone else.

I was mainly a hermit during my freshman year. We kept the door closed, and rarely made friends or met new people. Most of this was my shy, reserved personality at the time. I was pretty scared of new people and new situations.

One of the few things I did as a freshman outside of my room was intermural sports. My roommate and I played flag football and outdoor soccer. Well actually we ended up just watching our outdoor soccer team. I couldn't play because I sprained my knee playing racquetball the week before spring break. Huge bummer because I love sports.

One thing I did a lot of was play Halo 2. That encompassed most of my free time activities. I played a bunch online, and I think I got decent at it. I would play with my friends sometimes or sometimes I would just go alone online and play. That was probably when I was having the most fun.

When I think about my Freshman year, I always remember not being prepared or ready for what was coming my way. I had cruised through high school and had pretty good grades, and wasn't really challenged academically like I was when I first stepped into school at Purdue. I was not ready for the challenge, and I think it's one of the main reasons it took me 5 years to finish at Purdue. I have a few friends currently who are extremely motivated and work extremely hard at school, and I always say to them that if I worked as hard as they do now, I could graduate with a 4.0 gpa and in 4 years. I try to encourage them as much as possible, because if you get off to a bad start at college like I did, there is no end to the climbing out of the hole. You can never really recover. They know who they are...

This particular year in my life went by very quickly I think. I wish I would have stopped and smelled the roses while along for the ride. Sometimes I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and warn myself of my bad habits and things like that. I am an experimenter at heart. I like to try things out and see what happens instead of sitting on the sidelines and watching everyone else go for it. I like to roll the dice a little bit. I guess a few more friends also would have been nice...

It is really hard to remember back that far. I guess now all I can do is thank God for the awesome ride that was my freshman year.

To Infinity and Beyond...

Amy, a friend of mine has inspired me to write about my summer/future plans: http://amylopectinamy.blogspot.com/2010/05/you-know-how-excited-i-am.html

This one will be about some future plans of mine. At least what I know of them so far. Although most of my faithful readers kinda know what's going on already, I figured I could clarify a little more. At least now I can tell the whole story...

I guess it all started a year ago from last December, so December 2008. I was attending the Chi Alpha World Missions Summit in Cincinnati, OH. (I have a sticker on the back of my computer to prove it... ) This conference was a great time to get away, and more importantly, get closer to God. The funny thing is, looking back, I had no idea what God had started in me back then. Towards the end of the conference, a missionary with national Chi Alpha made the appeal to give a year and pray about a lifetime... What this means is to serve a Chi Alpha group and stuff for a year, to give your time to ministry and see what God might have planned for the rest of your life. I guess you could say they were recruiting people, and I decided I should volunteer. I am not gonna lie, part of me was doing it because everyone else was charging the stage. But there was another part of me that actually wanted to do it. That particular part of me felt that I almost owe my life to Chi Alpha. Hopefully God can work with that (I think He can...). So I signed the card and put it in the basket (and forgot about it).

I am here at Purdue majoring (or trying to) in medical technology. God kinda put a stop to that you could say. I wasn't selected to the program either time I applied. I have a good application, good references, and a decent GPA, but apparently that's not where God wanted me. I had always figured that if that's what God wanted for me, the door would open when I poked it so that I could walk in. I was poking my door really hard, but it wouldn't budge.

So a couple weeks ago I get this e-mail, I don't know where they got my e-mail from. But I have suspicions that it was from the card I signed a few years ago to volunteer for Give a Year, Pray about a Lifetime. It's about this "menternship" program they are starting down at National Chi Alpha. You can read for yourself here, because it's really hard to explain right now: http://www.chialpha.com/leaders/training/menternships/

I read the e-mail and briefly looked at the attached brochure and then forgot about it. I guess God has a way of remind you of things... I had always remembered signing that card, and had thought about it some. I wasn't sure what giving a year back would look like. I was definitely scared out of my mind about thinking about doing it. Let alone committing to it for the year...

I guess I felt like I wasn't good enough to be used, like I was too messed up for God to do anything good with me (which actually makes me a perfect candidate for use by God).

One afternoon at corporate prayer, the staff asks for people to write their names on the board concerning future things. There was a column for people feeling called into the ministry, people considering giving a year back, people that wanted to support financially, and another column that I don't remember. I saw these columns on the board. This was my moment of truth. Up until this point, I had not really told anyone else about signing the Give a Year card. I am pretty sure, unless they told all the campus pastors, that anyone knew I had signed it. So as usual, people rushed the chalkboard to put their name up. I kinda took my time getting up to the chalkboard. The idea is that you put your name on the board showing interest, and get prayed for. If it is a category that they can give you further advice for, they would do so, just as in my case.

So remember how I described how I felt I wasn't good enough to serve for the year, like there wasn't much I could bring to the table? Well a few weeks ago I went on this retreat for this class I was going through at church. Let's just say I highly recommend the Cleansing Stream class. Also to make a long story short (this post is long enough already right?), I had never felt so free after that retreat. I felt like I could do anything. I felt free from everything that was entangling me before. I felt as if I could fly... I think I finally felt "the peace that surpasses all understanding" (Phil 4:7).

I finally had the peace I was searching for. For the weeks leading up to the end of my last semester, people would always ask me what I was doing with the rest of my life. I would respond with "I don't know". They some would also flippantly tell me to Give a Year. Easy for them to say. They weren't looking it squarely in the face.

So I finally met with my campus pastor and we went over the previously mentioned menternship program. I asked my parents what they thought about it, and they approved. That made it official. I really am doing this Give a Year thingy. It felt sooooooo good to finally have an answer for people as to what I will be doing post-graduation.

I guess I could say God has made it really easy to walk through this door. This is really the only thing that has opened up for me. It is really easy to rely on God when He is your only option. I really feel like the walls are closing in on me sometimes. Old Me would have worried a hole in his stomach by now, but thankfully I have God's peace so I don't have any holes in my stomach.

That's my story, and I'm stickin' to it.

For some reason, I like writing novels on this thingy...

Words of Wisdom (or Experience) Part 9

This is my last week as a member of the student body of Purdue University, and America. I have been through a lot in my 4... (or make that 5) years of college. Lately I have been doing a lot of reflecting on my life here in West Lafayette and how it could have been different or it could have changed. It is a sobering thought that in 3 week's time I will really really be out on my own in the real world. So basically each day this week, I will try to leave you all with some story or something I have learned that you can use (if you like) in your own life. Maybe I have suffered some so you can suffer less by learning from my mistakes...

You Can't Reach Everyone, So Don't Even Try...
This one is a tough pill to swallow. Especially for a guy like me that identifies with lonely people, or people that are trying to reach out for friends. I just want to help everyone. I don't want to see anyone suffering. It really pains me to see my friends or the people around me struggle with pain from their past or their present situation. Maybe I am just a natural helper or whatever, but I can't help but want to reach out and try to help everyone.

Even Jesus didn't try to reach out to everyone. He wasn't traveling around and meeting with person after person every day of His 3 year ministry career. He didn't pour himself into everyone He met. He was able to meet surface needs of the people He ran into, like healings or casting of demons. But as far as personal relationships, he had a group of twelve, and even closer a group of three.

I have shed a lot of tears because of this. I can't help everyone. I don't even have close to enough capacity to help everyone. I think God has told me just to focus on a particular group and I am a part of, a particular demographic I have something in common with, especially during this year of college. In large part, this strategy has been successful. I encourage you to target specific people groups or even specific people when reaching out on behalf of God. Maybe God has put you into a certain situation just for that purpose.

Investment in a smaller group can have a greater impact than you think. The return on the investment just takes a little bit longer to realize. Focusing on a smaller group allows you to invest even more into each member, to go even deeper. You can also see your results easier. You can see if what you are doing is working, or if anything needs correction.

We are created to live in community with each other, but for our benefit and the benefit of others, the communities should remain smaller. If the groups get too big, don't be afraid to split them into smaller groups, with reunions every once in a while.

Also something else to consider is to keep the group opened to outsiders as much as possible. Avoid being closed off to others, unless there is a logistical reason to do so.

In conclusion groups > individuals and small groups > large groups.

Words of Wisdom (or Experience) Part 8

This is my last week as a member of the student body of Purdue University, and America. I have been through a lot in my 4... (or make that 5) years of college. Lately I have been doing a lot of reflecting on my life here in West Lafayette and how it could have been different or it could have changed. It is a sobering thought that in 3 week's time I will really really be out on my own in the real world. So basically each day this week, I will try to leave you all with some story or something I have learned that you can use (if you like) in your own life. Maybe I have suffered some so you can suffer less by learning from my mistakes...

Sunday (Bringing People With You)

I have decided I am going to keep this series opened and have something new everyday until I run out of stuff, which may or may not take a while. I have encountered a lot of pain and made a lot of mistakes in my lifetime, and there is no reason that anyone else should have the same pain or make the same mistakes if I can prevent that by sharing some bit of wisdom I have gained by experience.

This would probably be one of my more favorite topics. Since it is close to my heart. For most of my life I had felt like I was on the outside looking in. I was always the quiet, shy one. I was very bland and plain and not charismatic. I had a hard time getting people to include me. I felt uninvolved and not included. Of course I have never met anyone that enjoys feeling this way. Luckily, this is something we have power to deal with. All you have to do is ask.

This entry is about including people, but it is also about taking people with you to where ever you're going in Christ. Maybe there is some larger goal that will require help. How will the people that are supposed to help you even know if you don't go and recruit them? Someone else could even have something you need for such a time as this...

Matt 4:19 says "Come follow me" Jesus said, "and I will make you fishers of men."

Jesus was an includer of people and we should be as well.

I was raised not to invite myself to things. The first thing my Mom would ask me if I asked permission to spend the night at my friend's house, for example, is if they invited me or I invited myself. I guess she saw inviting yourself to things as intrusive, which it kinda is. Most people are courteous enough to wait for you to invite them to something, especially if it's a new person to the group. Most people are polite and won't push themselves onto your plans. This means you should reach out to them.

This is very important if you're in a position of leadership. Sometimes you have to be willing to go with the people you are leading. You must be willing to stop and reach back and take them by the hand and bring them with you.

Maybe you don't know this, but there are people out there waiting to join you. You don't have to look very far to find these people because they are all around you. There are people on the outside looking in at you... They want to be a part of the group, they want to help you. They are dying to be invited in. It is your job to do so...

Words of Wisdom (or Experience) Part 7

This is my last week as a member of the student body of Purdue University, and America. I have been through a lot in my 4... (or make that 5) years of college. Lately I have been doing a lot of reflecting on my life here in West Lafayette and how it could have been different or it could have changed. It is a sobering thought that in 3 week's time I will really really be out on my own in the real world. So basically each day this week, I will try to leave you all with some story or something I have learned that you can use (if you like) in your own life. Maybe I have suffered some so you can suffer less by learning from my mistakes...

Saturday (Blessings...It's a Two Way Street)

I actually was originally going to write about something else, which is also something important I have learned, but maybe I will save that one for part 8 :). This was also supposed to be the last one. Funny how things can change sometimes.

They say that "It is better to give than to receive." I will propose a second version of this. "It is easier to give than to receive."

One revelation I have had about this is that it takes two people for a blessing to transfer in most situation (I learned this in my discipleship program with XA). There are cases of anonymous blessings, but between two people, there generally must be two parties on the same page. There must be a giver, and a receiver.

I am not completely sure why it is so hard for us to receive blessings. Maybe it is because we aren't used to receiving from other people like we receive from God. A large part of it is probably our humility pride. Maybe we think we are not worthy of someone's general kindness and blessing. Or maybe we think we are too good for it? I don't know. I think there is equal blessing for someone who gives the blessing and who receives the blessing.

What if this blessing is something that is coming from God through another person? What if this person just wants to give back to you out of overflow that you have given to them? How destructive would that be to turn down a blessing like that? That could make a person feel pretty awful. Maybe they were so excited at the potential to bless you, to see the reaction on your face, and you have just taken that away by not letting them bless you. Blessings, whether they are material things, or words, or whatever are a special thing not to be taken lightly. There is a lot of thought that goes into blessings.

Maybe, for example, the next time someone offers to buy you dinner or a coffee at Starbucks, let them do it. Both of you will feel good, I promise (plus you will have a free Starbucks or free dinner).

Just always remember that it takes two for blessings to occur (as well as "to tango"). The giver of blessing gets just as much as the receiver.

Words of Wisdom (or Experience) Part 6

This is my last week as a member of the student body of Purdue University, and America. I have been through a lot in my 4... (or make that 5) years of college. Lately I have been doing a lot of reflecting on my life here in West Lafayette and how it could have been different or it could have changed. It is a sobering thought that in 3 week's time I will really really be out on my own in the real world. So basically each day this week, I will try to leave you all with some story or something I have learned that you can use (if you like) in your own life. Maybe I have suffered some so you can suffer less by learning from my mistakes...

Friday (Remember What God Has Done)

When you come to a big moment in life (like asking that first girl out, or graduating from college), it causes you to think about what has happened to you in the past. The highs and lows. Maybe I am just a crazy person, but when I get going on this type of thing, it can keep me up at night for hours. I have been through a lot, both good and bad, so it can take me a while to sift through it all.

When you are down in the dumps or have a few spare moments, remembering what God has done for you is a great thing to do with your time. Going down memory lane can bring up good, healthy feelings that can make you feel good again. Plus God deserves all glory and honor as well. I believe verbalizing these things is very powerful, even if you're alone. However, telling others about what God has done in your life can be powerful for both of you as well.

Your testimony is one of the most powerful things you carry with you. Rev 12:11 says They overcame him by the blood of the lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death. Here in this passage it is talking about the Devil, who is the accuser of our brothers. We overcome the Devil by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimony. This is how powerful our testimony is. In my opinion, you can't argue with someone's testimony. In the court of law, a witness testimony is the most powerful form of evidence. The things that God has personally done for you cannot be argued with. They are your experience.

I do recognize that some testimonies and stories are perhaps more sensitive than others, so using discretion is a great idea in this situation. But if you sense God or the Holy Spirit pushing you to speak up to a certain person, then do so. You can't lose. It doesn't hurt to open up and be vulnerable sometimes...